Changing Your Life is Hard, This is What it Actually Takes

Photo by Chris Hayashi on Unsplash

If I asked you to tell me something you wish you could change about yourself, chances are you could list four or five things off of the top of your head — your weight, income, relationship, diet, etc. So, why haven’t you changed yet?

On the other hand, if I asked you how you can make those changes though, you’d probably stare at me blankly or give excuses for why you can’t change. You’ve tried before, it’s your parent’s fault, you have bad genes, or it’s the government’s fault. Pick any excuse you want.

Everyone wants to change. Some of us try, but few succeed in creating lasting change. Most of us will only change when our circumstances and environment force us to, and then we will only go kicking and screaming.

I’m in no way a master at change. There are things in my life that I want to change — my income, my job, my eating habits — but I haven’t changed them yet. I resist big life changes like most other people because they’re uncomfortable. Even so, I have grown and changed in a lot of ways over the years.

What I know for sure is that real, lasting change doesn’t come about by following 3 simple steps, or an easy life hack.

Real and lasting change comes from changing your story, which changes your identity, and not from changing your…